#Cars of redline the movie movie
#Cars of redline the movie driver

Ambiguously Human: Due to his pointed ears and the fact that he wasn't given the introduction of being from 'that blue planet' like Miki and Todoroki, it's unknown if he's human or simply an alien that looks very human.

A pompadoured racer with a penchant for speed and crashing.

#Cars of redline the movie driver

The main protagonist, driver of the Transam 2000. If these donвЂ™t meet your extremely low entry criteria for watching a movie, congratulations - you have a fully functioning brain.Voiced by: Takuya Kimura (JP), Patrick Seitz (EN) TheyвЂ™re littered about the film theyвЂ™re just not naked enough. And for fans of half naked girls - have at it. There are plenty of scenes of poorly choreographed fist fights for your enjoyment. For fans of mindless violence Redline also delivers the bare necessities. There are plenty of races for your viewing pleasure (even though they are rather lame) and plenty of car crashes. These a some sweet vehicles and a most welcome departure from the riceboy shit propped up by вЂњThe Fast and the FuriousвЂќ franchise and вЂњPimp My RideвЂќ television series.ДЇor fans of racing Redline delivers the basics. Among a few I noticed were: a Lamborghini Murcielago Roadster, a Ferrari Enzo, a Porsche Carrera GT, a Koenigsegg CCR, Ford GT, a Mercedes SLR McLaren and a Saleen S7 Twin Turbo. The lone positive of Redline is the cars. Anything that reduces the amount of money coming into the coffers is a very bad thing. All it did was delay any money making opportunities from DVD rentals and purchases. The theatrical release of Redline wonвЂ™t make a dent in the 30+ million dollars it cost to make. The producers of the вЂњAmerican PieвЂќ franchise figured that out when they put out the pile of trash вЂњAmerican Pie 5: The Naked MileвЂќ curbside.

#Cars of redline the movie movie

However, when a movie is this bad, it really should make itвЂ™s way through the DTV (direct to video) distribution channels. No doubt they were hoping to make a quick buck or two. I lied when I said I couldnвЂ™t fathom why the producers went ahead with this movie.

When car manufacturers wonвЂ™t let their emblems be shown in a movie about cars, something is amiss.

Substituting names like Hiagra for Viagra and NSCRA for NASCAR is pathetic.

Hell, they donвЂ™t work in video games well either.

Split sceen shots donвЂ™t work in movies.

Only 30% of the girls here are worth their mustard. Hot bimbos go hand-in-hand with car racing movies. If youвЂ™re going to do a movie of this type you have to at least do better than вЂњ The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift.вЂќ

Where did they find these people? Arrest them for their crimes against humanity!

A Chinese director (Andy Cheng) who has no directorial experience and is only known for his fight coordination in Jackie Chan movies.

If not a single semi-recognizable actor signs on, the movie is going to be bad (Eddie Griffin does not count). Hell, the plug should have been pulled during the pitching. LetвЂ™s do a quick rundown of black flags that should have caused the plug to be pulled on this car wreck after the first day of shooting. I canвЂ™t possibly fathom what Chicago Pictures (the producers) were thinking. Wait scratch that - I can do this all day.

Now that the niceties are through lets get down to business. So take your pick, because both of those possibilities are valid beginnings to my review of Redline. Or perhaps I should start by asking what the fuck is someone thinking about when they finance a movie they know is a complete piece of shit. Maybe I should begin by saying IвЂ™m an asshole for going to see a movie I know is going to suck terribly. Where do I begin? I never quite know how IвЂ™m supposed to start a movie review, when I have already formed my opinion before seeing the film.